if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Randomize
