Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
