she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
