I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize