you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Randomize