The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
