So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
