We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Houston, we have a squirter
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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