On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize