i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
