Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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