he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Do vagina's smell?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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