I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Randomize
