I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize