just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
