the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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