I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.