Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
