my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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