Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
