Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Randomize
