Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize