Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
