Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
