No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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