so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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