i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
