I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
