you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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