i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
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