I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
