Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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