its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
