Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Randomize
