We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
