3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
