We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize