just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
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