Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize