After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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