Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
