butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Randomize
