i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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