just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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