i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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