We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
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you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
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I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
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