it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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