theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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