She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize