She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize