dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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